LYRICS

LYRICS

Monsteroma (2005)

All these song notes were written by lyricist Ty Semaka,

so if you have questions or issues, ask or blame him.

Klezma Mezma

(Lewis)

Somewhat inspired by a great band called Hoven

Droven. Take something traditionally played lighter,

play it light, then play it heavy.

Bollywood Queen

(Semaka/Lewis/Kolodziejzyk/Nordstrom)

I know I’m gonna burn for this one, but Indian women

turn my rock n’ roll crank. I hope they’ll just take it as a

compliment. I mean, did Jagger get flack for “Brown

Sugar”, or Bowie for “China Girl”?

What’s yer skinny little story brown thing?

So damn pretty I forgot how to sing

Little top heavy gonna give me a thrill

Take a long drive through

the Bollywood Hills

So itty bitty that I took a big chance

What’s it gonna take for a seven veil dance?

She giggled I wiggle for the beat bhangra

Sonali Bandra yoni sittin’ in my

ya ya ya ya

Bollywood Queen

I wanna Bollywood Queen

Messy little desi with a queen size nose

Big brown lookers and glosette toes

Big white teeth in a jasmine mouth

Six long arms but I wanna go south

Pre-Chorus

Lisa Ray yoni sittin in my

ya ya ya ya

Chorus

Midnight mane on a baby horse face

Cinnamon sticks gonna win that race

Jet black bush on a mud flat gut

Scimitar hips and a hash ball butt

Pre-Chorus

Bipasha Basu unit sittin’ in my

ya ya ya ya

Chorus

Bollywood Vamp

(Semaka/Kinjo/Lewis)

There are Queens and there are vamps.

Bag of Snakes

(Semaka/Lewis)

A song about resisting temptation on the road.

As a Libra I can scale anything

I can balance pleasure and pain

I can hide my weakness

from everyone

Make the Koolaide

look like champagne

We throw on the show

for the muses you know

But I’ve got a goddess at home

So I keep my viper

in check my friend

When it’s over, we sleep alone

And if I fail

will this love prevail?

If I should fall

will I lose it all?

A pretty face is all it takes

to open up the bag of snakes

A skinny waist is all it takes

to open up the bag of snakes

As a painter I can hang anything

I can take you into my head

I can draw you closer than anyone

Make a wasteland taste like sunset

We throw on the show

for the muses you know

But my masterpiece is at home

I should learn to daub her

the same fake sky

So she won’t take another dark roam

CHORUS

In the end it’s true

I’ve seen everything

With a jaded eye for arrows

Cupid uses me as a guinea pig

In a maze of cleavage and toes

We throw on the show

for the muses you know

But I’ve got my own Shangri-la

With a wink they’re up

‘til the sun arrives

While I dream a tarantella

CHORUS

Antipop

(Semaka/Lewis/Kolodziejzyk)

Originally titled “The Rebel Factory”, about

how the music biz makes rebels out of rich

kids and recently, burnt out has-beens,

but the better title came from a Matthew

Good song of the same name, which was a

great song, but not really deserving of the

title because of it’s overt radio friendliness.

Long after we wrote our ‘Antipop’, I found

out that Primus had a brilliant album AND

song of the same title, but rather than

retracting the title, this made me feel even

more justified in claiming it back from Matt.

There in the Rebel Factory

they crank out one by one

Marionetteworth puppets

forced upon you ‘til your numb

Barrel: The Council of

Time/Warner/Viacom/Sony

Telling you what you want

according to majority and

that same majority

McDonald’s every artery

Bigger is better in

United States of Armory

Why not make Springer President

and Rome will finally fall

It’s sad when Doctor Phil’s

the smartest Murkin of them all

I grew up anti popular

So tragically I lack

But as the world degenerates

I’d like to take that back

Let’s follow Ozzy as he

stumbles, stumbles, stumbles-

Sharon!

through his lines on coke

He sold his soul to MTV

you know ‘cause he was broke

And now they package crap

and sprinkle it with fairy dust

Till Avril Can’t-Sing-Live is

marketed more than Christmas

Matt Goody so abused

the perfect title ‘Antipop’

Clever enough to use it

but the song was just more ... pop

I’m here to claim it back

and tell you truth instead of pap

Everyone else can

(rhyme) fire (with) desire

and barf out “Ya-ee-ya”!

CHORUS

Somebody told me

that the trip to fame is

10 years long, but all it really takes

is some old suit to write yer song

prop up an anorexic model

and hit the money switch

then get some dancers

to distract ‘em from the anti-pitch

and now you’re stealing me

and saying it’s just ‘peer to peer’

well how ‘bout I take your girl

and pass her ‘round

from ‘beard to beard’?

I know you wouldn’t mind

as long as they were paying Johns

But that’s the injury to insult

ya they just take our songs

(profanity and curses)

Schwartze’s Sirba

(Abe Schwartz)

A standard repertoire klezmer melody written by

Romanian American klezmer violinist & composer,

Abe Schwartz. First introduced to Jonathan by Allan

Merovitz, former lead singer of the Flying Bulgar

Klezmer Band, now leader of Calgary’s Klezmerovitz

klezmer ensemble. Go buy their album and

check out www.klezmerovitz.com

Black Cloud 9

(Semaka/Lewis/Nordstrom)

A song about a complicated ex of mine, and

kind of myself, so I wrote it in first person.

I rule on higher ground

a bluer valley far below you

I’ve done it all but cannot show you

how I succeed

Cause I’m a pillar in a pit

maternity ward mortuary

a walking contradictionary

that nobody can read

So why should I

believe a word you say?

I’m resolutely sure as grey

Obey the instant expert signs

Or you won’t reach my black cloud 9

Now you show me a pipe

I’ll have your dream

and then I’ll change it

know just enough to rearrange it

to spring a leak

Or simply bring a brick

I’ll tell you how to build a mansion

But I won’t lift a flippin’ hand son

I’m just the control freak

CHORUS

So take these magic beans

I’ll take your cow

and farmer’s daughter

hot air ballooning under water

I’m Duke of The Ship

And when the stalk is grown

While on your way down to my castle

you’ll realize I’m just an asshole

I’m your King Hypocrite

CHORUS

Help! I’m a Logo

(Semaka/Lewis/McNeil)

The title, an homage to Frank Zappa’s ‘Help! I’m A Rock’.

The song inspired by a friend who said I looked like a logo for the band. Also about friends, fame, lack of fame etc.

I wanna take you with me

But you were off and iffy

You wanna step out side now

Bring it on - Bring it on

I wanna take you bowlin’

For art and higher knowin’

But you were fuggin’ borin’

Wake it up - Wake it up

I just wanna be different

just like everybody else

Take a look at the numbers

Is that what it takes to sell?

Someone help I’m a logo

and it’s 1 degree in Hell

May it never freeze

We don’t speak Onourknese

I got a horny hair cut

And workin’ on the beer gut

But never keep my mouth shut

Break it down - Break it down

I don’t know how you stand me

I go too far so brand me

You wanna hear the candy

Make it up - Make it up

CHORUS

Oh no, here come da vampire

To suck your soul by campfire

Blah blah about himself and

On and on - On and on

I love the look elation

Without the conversation

The constant obligation

Make it stop - Make it stop

CHORUS

Underground

(Semaka/Lewis/Nordstrom)

A song about being addicted to making art

and the struggle to keep the band going and growing.

Creating a moment

out of nothing at all

I’m alone in a dream world

where the dinosaurs fall

every building a mural

every light bulb a flame

And to hang onto one girl

is as easy as fame

Reinventing the shoe string

out of nothing but drive

I’m a bull in a veal cage

surprised I’m alive

Every thank you a banquet

every dancer a light

And to hang onto this one

will be my drive tonight

No make-up, no light show

Nobody taking care of sound

No limo, no label

No one hears you underground

When you’re moving a mountain

but you can’t find the mole

Escape in your musing

while I’m diggin’ my hole

Every argument a melody

every incubus soothed

And holding onto your beauty

is as simple as you

CHORUS

They say I was born smirking

sardonic and . . . weird

Still lost in that daydream

supernormal feared

Every corner a playground

no one’s ever alone

I’m a prince in a sandbox

while the neighbors play Stones

CHORUS

Vladimir Wakes

(Semaka/Lewis)

A re-recording of Vladimir’s Wake

from the album ‘Tongue & Groove’.

Live At The Koornbeurs.

Delft, Holland - May 6, 04

Recorded at our favourite Dutch club.

Great friends, great fans, and great times we’ve

enjoyed in this 700 year old building that has

been a meat market, a grain/corn exchange,

WWII Nazi headquarters, and now a youth

club run by volunteer/members.

Leo’s Restaurant

(Semaka/Lewis/Kolodziejzyk)

From the album ‘In Klezskavania’.

Miserlou

(Wise/Leeds/Tauber Roubanis.

Erika Publishing)

From the album ‘Belladonna’.

Russian History XXX

(Semaka/Lewis)

From the album ‘Belladonna’.

Bigger Than I

(Semaka/Kolodziejzyk/Lewis)

From the album ‘Belladonna’.

Koornbanter

The Devils & a few friends being funny.

Moxam

Under the monicker ‘Moxam’, Jonathan

Lewis has delved into electronica. We found

these two tracks sinister enough to include.

Socio-Political Ramifications

(Moxam/Lewis)

Cue 45 Test 1

(Moxam/Lewis)

For Alberta Theatre Projects’ 2005 production of

Greg MacArthur’s ‘Get Away’. This was the

post curtain-call mayhem.

Belladonna (2002)

Flea Circus

Damas e cabaleros

los wapos bastardes

Los Diablos de la Lunegua de Plaid!

(translation)

Ladies & gentlemen

those hot bastards

The Devils of the Tongue of Plaid!

Well Im the jet of the net

Im a captain of the industry

Better get it or the better gonna get me

I’m a surfer with a tie and a strip-o-gram

of a baby & a terrorist bomb plan