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Maggie’s Milk


Young Maggie was a milkmaid
She cleaned the cattle shed
She hated working in the hay
And shoveling the shit
Oh but she liked the milking
And drinking all the cream
But one day in the barn
She knocked her noggin on a beam


She went a little loopy
Milked every bessie good
She filled up every barrel there
And drank em’ where she stood
The farmer snapped his cap & then
He wanted Maggie dead
‘Cause when she ran away
She took the cow that had 2 heads

 

Eventually her oddity would prove to bring her luck
She traded Heddy for a job
to drive a dairy truck
No hay to shovel no shit to pitch
And here’s mud in your eye
Ya punch a hole in the son of a bitch
And suck the tanker dry
Then turn the 18 wheeler round
Back to the factory
And fill er’ up on to the top
With Maggie’s Milk for me


Now Maggie’s bust had swollen
From drinking tankers dry
The silo’s got to Milo
Catching more than Milo’s eye
Now Milo liked the milking
And drinking all the cream
But one day in the barn
He knocked his noggin on a beam

 

He went a little loopy
And milked his Maggie good
He hooked her to the factory
And slapped her on the hood
She kept the factory rolling
For many prosperous years
But first she married Milo
Who took over shifting gears


Eventually her oddity
would prove to bring her luck
Cause people came from everywhere
to see her dairy trucks


CHORUS

 

Now Maggie had a daughter
She cleaned the cattle shed
She hated working in the hay
And shoveling the shit
Oh but she liked the milking
And drinking all the cream
But one day in the barn
She knocked her noggin on a beam

 

She went a little loopy
Milked every bessie good
She filled up every barrel there
And drank em’ where she stood
Now Maggie snapped her cap &
then she wanted Maggie dead
‘Cause when she ran away
She took the truck that had two heads

 

Eventually her oddity would prove to bring her luck
Cause people came from everywhere
to see young Maggie fuck


CHORUS